Find a small problem
(yes you read it right! I imagine that we all have a small problem we try to ignore, so why not address it now, whilst it’s only small,)
- Think of a problem or question that you can resolve today
- Choose something small and simple
- Nothing life changing
- For example: ‘ shall I stop off for some milk on the way home, or do without it today?’or ‘shall I eat out for dinner today?’ Or ‘what colour scheme shall I paint the living room?’
Write down here your small problem/question:
When you are in the being mode you are:
- Fully connected with the present moment
- Accepting of things the way they are
- Open to all emotions
- Tranquil, still and grounded
This doesn’t happen all at once. Being mode takes practice. The more out of touch you become with being the more practice it will need to return there. However, we are not talking months or years; as with new skills the more you practice the better you become.
Being again. Excercise 6
Cast your memory back to Excercise 2 – in this Excercise you allowed yourself to be ‘just in the moment’ listening to the sounds around you, and how this made you think and feel.
This time I would like you to focus just on your breathing. Don’t try to change it, however, as I’m asking you to observe your breathing your breathing rate may automatically change as you are now aware of your breathing.
Allow your mind to clear.
Imagine your thoughts are like balloons, gently floating away from you in the sky.
If a thought appears, whilst sitting quietly, only concentrating on your breath, you can allow it to be in your mind, but instead of trying to grasp it, let it float gently away from you, concentrating once again on your breathing.
I would like you know to try this skill, and take note on how you felt afterwards.
Is there something you would to change next time?
Were your surroundings ok?
Was the timing right for you?
Most importantly, did you feel more relaxed. I hope so! If not do not worry, try it again, and again, you’ve nothing to lose, you only need yourself, no equipment necessary, so no excuses!!
What about the little problem/question you had in exercise 5?
If you think of it now do feel as though the answer appeared as if by magic. If that’s not the case do not worry.
Being mode is not primarily a problem-solving technique, it’s much more important than that! But sometimes it can aid in our problem-solving methods!
Doing mode is not helpful when you are dealing with emotions. In fact it is very unhelpful. Whilst you are trying to keep yourself busy, you are keeping your emotions at arms length therefore not dealing with raw emotions.
When you are in the doing mode you tend to be goal orientated, looking for solutions. You may also be locked into autopilot, which means you react automatically without thinking of any consequences. This means bad news for close relationships.
The next exercise will focus on your emotions. So come back to do the next exercise!!